Sunday, May 21, 2006

Of Fishing and Bank Accounts

Yesterday, Dave, Kathryn and I met up in Silverthorne, CO, for a day of "Gold Medal" fishing on the Blue River. I use scare quotes here because until about 4:00 in the afternoon, I wasn't even convinced the river contained any fish at all. I didn't catch any. I didn't see any. I didn't see anyone else catch any until about 4 - and an hour later, I pulled a gorgeous 16" rainbow out. Unfortunately Kathryn didn't have the camera at the ready, so there is no photographic proof. But trust me, it was a blazing pinkish rainbow [insert your own joke about homosexual fish here].

Now, yesterday morning on my way out of the 7200, I stopped by McDonald's for breakfast. I usually avoid fastfood restaurants, especially McDonald's, like I avoid church picnics... but for sentimental reasons, I often get breakfast at McDonald's at the start of early-morning road trips. This goes way back to my childhood and memories of cartrips with my mom.

Anyway, I tried to use my debit card to pay for breakfast and it declined. This put a damper on the rest of the day, except for those brilliant few minutes where I had the rainbow on the line. You see, readers, there is nothing - quite literally nothing - that makes me feel ashamed and incompetent and stupid and irresponsible and very unlike an adult as fiscal loserliness.

I turn 34 this Sunday, and I still effing borrow money from my parents. Kathryn did her best yesterday to convince me that anyone could have done this in my situation - on student loans with no steady income and various random costs lately, etc. - and I'm trying really hard not to berate myself. But it still sucks, and I'm still ashamed, and these things go deeeep into my psyche about not measuring up.

At least I caught that effing fish.


At 10:16 AM, Blogger Leta said...

It's a karma thing - in a previous life, the fish always had lots of ready money. The mills of destiny (and karma) grind slow, but they grind fine indeed.

Seriously, until you have a job with a 401k or a pension and with lots of health benefits and your salary is only ever mentioned in $K/yr and never as $/hr, there will be some financial hiccups. (And this is coming from someone who *thought* that she had $20 in her purse on Friday night, which she didn't, so she had to write a check to a friend for the $20 to cover the bar bill. And so it goes.)

Your birthway was *this past* Sunday? I thought it was the 28th.

At 10:25 AM, Blogger dirk.mancuso said...

Shit happens, Trout. And while being short on the Benjamins tneds to make one feel pretty crappy at times, just remember that it's just a roadbump and it too shall pass.

Instead, focus on the fact you are a smart, funny guy with a good head and a good heart. With a lot of people who care about him.

Great. Now people will read this and realize that little black lump in my chest cavity is beating.

I hate you.


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